Thursday, November 24, 2005
finally...i'm back
MIA-ed for a million years (well, at least it feels like)
sorry folks...
miss me?
...
anyway.
i'm like super stressed out now, super tired everyday and my everyday schedule is packed to the brim.
crappy, shittified life.
one good thing though - i'm gonna watch Harry Potter with Edna later tonight!
woo-hoo
finally get to watch...after waiting so many weeks and days for the other people.
=D
i'm in the school comp lab now and my head hurting like crazy now.
sigh.
i think it's the sun.
horrendous, horrigible sun.
oh well.
christmas is coming in about 1 month's time...and i so want him to be around to accompany me for christmas. sigh. but he won't be around. i'll miss him. bleah. but at least i think we can spend new year together.
hmm. i gtg. gotta go email my project group matez since thy're so often not around. sigh. catcha soon!
'fallen_angel'
3:10 PM
Friday, November 18, 2005
The guy who loves you,
can't tell you the reason why he loves you.
he only knows that,
in his eyes, you are the only one.
The guy who loves you,
always make you mad,
but he never knows what stupid things he did,
as everything did,
is for your own good.
The guy who loves you,
seldom praises you ,
but in his heart,
you are the best and only he knows it,
The guy who loves you,
will scold or complain if you didn't reply his messages but others,
because he cares.
The guy who loves you ,
Only drops his tears in front of you,
when you try to wipe his tears, you are touching his heart,
the heart which beats for you.
The guy who loves you ,
will remember every word you said, even its accidental,
and he uses the word at the nick of time.
The guy who loves you,
will not give any promises that easily,
because they don't want to break any of them
they want you to believe him and
they want to give you the happiest and safest life ever after.
The guy who loves you, always tell you not to think too much,
because they have planned everything for you,
he wants to give you the best life in the future,
he wants to give you a suprise,
believe him that he can do it.
The guy who loves you,
can't remember every special occasion like some kind of anniversary,
but, he knows that, for every second he lives,
he's loving you, no matter which day it is.
The guy who loves you,
won't say " i love you" that easily,
because everything he has done for you is a sign that he loves you already,
he will only say it only at the special occasion,
because he doesn't want you to misunderstand,
he wants you to know that he loves you.
The guy who really loves you,
will feel that,
sometimes, something have to be told only once,
because he thought that you might already understand him,
if he says too much,
he will feel that there's nothing you will cherish.
The guy who loves you,
will go to airport to fetch you,
he won't carry a bunch a rose and call you darling like what you expect,
but he will carry your luggage and ask you " why are you becoming that thin within two days?" with his sincere heart.
The guy who loves you, will listen quietly to you,
when you are mad, and you finished rambling,
he will say, you still have class tomorrow, sleep earlier .
with a smile.
The boy who loves you,
doesn't know if he should call you when you are angry,
but he will send a message to you after few hours.Even if you ask
him why he only calls that late,
he will say, when you are angry, my explanation are all rubbish to you.
It is only when you calm down, my explanation will work.
The boy who loves you, always call you little girl,
but everytime he wants to make a big decision, he
will want to hear your advice first.
The guy who loves you, doesn't like little toys like teddy bears,
but he will always put the bear you give him at his bed.
The guy who loves you will apologize uncontrollablly when both of you argue,
although you are the one who's in the wrong.
Later, he will send a message to you with
" baby, actually you know its your fault, you know it yourself "
The guy who loves you, while missing you,
will want to buy a bunch of rose
and wait for you stupidly under your apartment.
but he never knows, what he bought is daisy.
It doesn't matter, because in his heart, they are all roses.
The guy who loves you, seldom say sweet words,
but you know, his kisses already transfer his all passion to you.
The guy who loves you,
will try to make himself busy if he can't see you,
so that he wouldn't have any time to remember you.
If not, he will keep missing you
and not be able to do anything about it.
The guy who loves you will indeed do stupid stuff
that make his friends call him a loser,
but he just wants to make sure you see him
and be aware of his presence,
in a seemingly childish yet mature way.
--------------------------
The above was something i read somewhere and adapted it here for all to see...
it's nothing much but i just feel some of it is kinda meaningful.
might not apply to everyone but just for reference ah...
take care all!
'fallen_angel'
1:16 PM
Tuesday, November 15, 2005
back!
went to eat at 'M'sia' with Rozy, Li Ping and Alex a.k.a Barry
ha-ha
had lotsa laughs =D
and, i'm no longer starving!
yay...
anyway, where was i?
hmm. oh right...
what goes into those sauces.
massive, humongously disgusting amounts of oil.
oil = fats
super gross.
but, i'm never gonna stop eating mayonnaise.
i love mayo!
and all it's other products like tartar sauce.
i guess i'll just exercise more?
haha
fat hope.
nah...nevermind ah.
i got mummy's genes.
which probably means i'll grow fat as soon as i hit my late 20s
so, i can't really be bothered to try hiding that fact.
haha...
so dear, if you love me, you're gonna have to love my fats too!
sorry if i'm blabbering too much now...
i'm really trying to find stuff to do while i pass time.
lotsa time...lots and lots of it now.
he's still not done at service.
sigh.
took this pic awhile ago and i thought i look retarded. well, actually it was my darling Drago who took the pic. so super candid. and once again, i'm uploading this only b'cos i'm so bored. =D
i wanna go KTV! i know i know...i've been saying this since forever but really, i haven't gone yet. and i have this bad feeling that we'll be too busy to go anytime soon too. ugh. and i wanna go ZoukOut... but i guess i'll most probably have to give it a miss... okay okay. this post is getting long and boring. i'll go off now and come back when i'm bored again. bye!
'fallen_angel'
2:01 PM
in TAS's comp lab now...
just finished the first Culinary Science kitchen training
and guess what?
i'm starving!
hungry hungry hungry.
hmph
if you're curious to know why i'm still here after class, i'll tell you.
cos i'm waiting for him to finish his service class.
according to what i've heard,
they'll knock off only 3 plus.
and that means, i'll be starving for another 2 or more hours.
bleargh.
what to do.
just pray that Neo and gang will get so annoyed by such a huge group of students and let them go early.
he owes me a meal.
haha
cos i chose to wait for him
he should feel guilty.
well, training today only taught some vegetable cuts
batonette, macedoine, julienne, etc...
oh and we learnt some sauces too.
finally, i now know what mayonnaise, vinaigrette and thousand island dressing are made up of.
okay...my sayang is here so i've got someone to entertain me =P
gonna go eat...later!
'fallen_angel'
12:43 PM
Monday, November 14, 2005
barely one week of school, and i'm stressed out.
damn
what is the rest of the semester gonna turn out like?
i'm not expecting much...just praying for the best.
with the previous semester so screwed up, i can't afford to repeat the disastrous results again.
sigh
i've decided i won't allow people to let me down.
whatever it is, i'll put in my best efforts.
projects, if no-one else works, i'll work harder and make up for it.
i don't care if i'll seem silly to do the work for others. i need the grades.
i don't do, who will?
i just hope everything goes smoothly...
now that i'm gonna start work as well, it's gonna be worse.
a challenge to my time-management skills.
sigh
i hope he'll understand my situation when i can't spend much time outside of school with him.
i'll try my best alright?
i'll still treasure breakfast times every morning =D
updates here will get lesser and lesser so...don't blame me eh?
ciaoz people!
'fallen_angel'
8:11 PM
Wednesday, November 09, 2005
i was just thinking... ... ... ... ...
we often think: "if he'll change, my life will be so much easier and happier"
but first, can you change yourself?
can you give up your favourite food from today on?
can you kick your bad habit?
can you not complain about every little thing?
can you not show your temper from now on?
can you stop being so conceited?
can you be true to your feelings?
see? even changing yourself is almost mission impossible.
what makes you think someone else can do it?
we often grumble:
"if it isn't for him, i wouldn't be like that ok?!"
"if he treats me better, i'd treat him better too!"
so, why don't YOU be nice to him first?
in an exchange, both goods have to be of equal value at least.
love for love
gratitude for gratitude
passion for passion
honesty for honesty
And we can only exchange change for change
Change yourself, make him happy.
He's happy, he'll want to change to show he appreciates you.
if you've changed and he shows no remorse, you haven't really lost much.
but in turn, you've kicked your bad habits.
don't you think you're in a better position to find someone better?
then, he'll instantly want to improve his chances to keep you by his side...
by changing for the better...
change is part and parcel of life
what matters most is why, how and what you change.
for whom you change, is not of importance.
at the end of the day, you benefit from it all...
that's what i tell myself.
'fallen_angel'
7:59 PM
Tuesday, November 08, 2005
"first" day of school
and
i got bored outta my prettie new shoes.
like hell~oo?
falling asleep during the first lecture of the semester?
NOT a very fantastic start to the new semester aite?
jeez.
sorry man...
it's just not my fault.
She was just too friggin' boring and i bet many share my sentiments.
she's ANNOYINGLY ANNOYING.
like massively.
and i found out we've got only 4 hr plus shifts for each Culinary Science practical session.
wadehell??!!
come on...no way we can learn anything substantial lar.
sigh~
now, i've got a learning log to produce...can i procrastinate?
not a very good idea huh?
sigh~~
okay.
now that school has started, i'm gonna slack on bloggin' so...
see ya all soon!
'fallen_angel'
8:22 PM
Monday, November 07, 2005
Sky High totally rocks!
well, at least to me it does =)
hmm...who wants to be my superhero?
applications starts right now!
haha.
i'm being crappy and lame.
bleargh.
well...had an enjoyable day...
lunch at Bakerzin and the pasta is yum-yum, finger-lickin' good.
haha...seems not appropriate but wadehell.
erm...shopping?
Bought 2 pairs of shoes from C&K and shirts from Giordano...more basics to make dressing for school simple and effortless =D
now, i'm home dreading having to wake up at like...5 am tomorrow?
ugh
hope i can sleep early tonight or i'll be dragging myself to Sentosa tomorrow morning.
sigh.
nothing else to be written here...so....ciaoz!
p.s. Guo Mei Mei's mandarin cover of Numa Numa Iei is just gross and hair-raising. God save my ears!
Lotsa Lurve!!!
'fallen_angel'
9:26 PM
Sunday, November 06, 2005
yay!
finally, right before we start school again, i caught up with Rozy...
suddenly realised how much i've been neglecting my dear friends....
2 months of holidays, and i didn't even get to meet up with Rozy, Edna and a whole lotta other peeps.
so much to catch up just now...but had to join mum and dad for dinner at Muthu's Curry...
guess we'll see each other in school and catch up whenever we can...
i'm looking forward to school on Tuesday...Culinary Science!
haha...
too bad tmw no school...
oh welll
dammit!
i gotta go....got a very important testi monial/appraisal to write by tuesday and i haven't started!
ciaoz all~!
'fallen_angel'
8:46 PM
Friday, November 04, 2005
This is a rather unknown song but i like it nonetheless...
shall share it here -
====================
. Nobody Knows . by Derek McDonald
I pretended I'm glad you went away
These four walls closin' more everyday
ANd I'm dying inside
And nobody knows it but me
Like a clown I put on a show
The pain is real even if nobody knows
Now I'm cryin' inside
And nobody knows it but me
Why didn't I say the things I needed to say
How could I let my angel get away
Now my world is just a-tumblin' down
I can see it so clearly
But you're nowhere around
The nights are so lonely
The days are so sad
And I just keep thinkin' about
The love that we had
And I'm missing you
And nobody knows it but me
I carry a smile when I'm broken in two
Now I'm nobody without someone like you
I'm tremblin' inside, and nobody knows it but me
I lie awake, it's a quarter past three
I'm screamin' at night
As if I thought you'd hear me
Yeah my heart is calling you
And nobody knows it but me
How blue can you get
You could ask my heart
But like a jigsaw puzzle it's been torn all apart
A million words couldn't say just how I feel
A million years from now you know I'll be loving you still
Tomorrow morning I'm hitting the dusty road
Gonna find you wherever, ever you might go
I'm gonna unload my heart
And hope you come back to me
Said when the nights are lonely...=====================
'fallen_angel'
1:25 PM
Timetable's finally out!
woo-hoo~!
and we're all in the same class
hmmm....
that leaves some room for consideration, doesn't it?
i'm in the same class as him.
good? or bad?
well, to me it's kinda okay.
at least we can have our breaks together, meet for breakfast again and all that...
guess i'm hoping things can be the same as last semester...when situations are not so complicated?
oh well
maybe for the next 3 or 4 months, we'll be so busy with tutorials, lectures, projects and stuff that i'll be distracted from all the crap that's on my mind now.
i sure hope so.
and i got Jap for my CDS!
yippee!
it was my first choice but i was beginning to hope for Creative Writing really.
oh well.
and one thing i really hate about my new time-table?
the lectures are like one after another and they are all in different seminar rooms in different blocks.
like he-lloooo~?
annoyingly annoying sia
and of all my tutors, i only recognise Mr. Ram.
the rest are like....uh-huh. they exist?
and erm. project how?
back to the same group?
sigh.
it's cool with me ah...but i seriously hope people will buck up.
last sem's projects all seriously screwed up.
this sem i cannot afford that...like seriously.
i don't want Bs and Cs anymore. i hate seeing them on my transcript.
sigh.
Gav said housekeeping. hahaha...like how?
well...we'll see how things go lar.
as much as i want to, it's prolly not a very good idea to work together with him.
like Gav said: "**** IS NOT JOINING OUR GRP"
ha-ha.
oh well.
sigh.
now, i need money for stuff like new stationery, textbooks and ez-link concession.
i thought i could pay for them with my pay from Loreal but Lilian said i'll get my pay only end of December!
like wadehell lar!
what's gonna happen now?
shittified.
life sucks...big time.
'fallen_angel'
12:15 PM
Thursday, November 03, 2005
Something's wrong with Blogger today...
couldn't log on the whole day.
oh well
sigh
another boring public holiday
and i'm here, bored outta my shoes at home.
i so wanna go out tonight...somewhere, anywhere.
hmph
too bad there's no one around to accompany me.
sigh
school's starting soon.
and i haven't satisfy my need for KTV.
sigh
and i so wanna watch movie - sky high, tom-yum goong...
but tix too ex... no-one wanna watch with me. sigh
i know there are decisions waiting to be made but i'm taking the cowardly way out.
avoiding it all.
who knows?
it might be worse than it already is.
all i can say is whoever i've let down, i'm sorry..
so so sorry...
~fallen angel, disillusioned soul~
'fallen_angel'
6:47 PM
Wednesday, November 02, 2005
The Exorcism of Emily Rose and Cleo's take on it:
it's one hell of a show.
during the show, it's really scary and nerve-wrecking.
after the show, it becomes traumatising.
every scene just keeps playing back itself in my mind and spooks me out.
watch it if you like spooking yourself out.
it's not your typical ghost story cos you know, somehow, that's it's highly likely to be true.
i can't describe the feeling, but what i know is that from now on, if i wake up to pee in the middle of the night, i won't be looking at the time. that's for sure. in case i see 3:00 on my clock. brrr...
anyway
i just wanted to express my thanks to 2 exceptional taxi drivers from last night.
driver no.1 went out of his way to get a cab for me at 12 midnight 'cos he couldn't afford the time to send me all the way to Pasir Ris from Holland V.
he got his friend, driver no.2 to pick me up at Sixth Ave.
and no.1 even waited with me till no.2 came.
no.2 didn't even start the meter till we almost got on the PIE.
so people? don't condemn all taxi drivers aite? there are marvellous ones out there as well. hope they stay so and hope i get to board their cab once again, one day.
oh well.
today? hmm... indulged in my favourite past-time once again.
got a book from Kinokuniya and chilled out at Starbucks.
on the way to Wheelock from Ngee Ann City, i ran into a project coordinator from i Models International(IMI)
he says want to get me to go for some audition.
ha-ha.
what a joke.
i'm probably like the 30th girl he approached lar.
i was in the business before. i know the works. ridiculous.
maybe just for curiousity's sake i'll go look-see-look-see.
but i'll bet that i'll need to pay for portfolio, photos, etc etc.
ugh.
what's new?!
saw nicholas on star idol just now...
he probably doesn't remember me but hmm...i'll still support him.
he's got an amazing smile! woo-hoo!
school starting next week.
yippee!
i love school now. if only it excludes projects and all that crap.
hmm.
oh well.
it adds colour to my life at TAS.
and by god, i want to know my friggin' timetable!
and i wanna know what CDS i got...though i'm pretty sure it's Creative Writing.
Just as well lar...i like reading and writing.
'fallen_angel'
8:11 PM
